Thursday 26 July 2012

Book Review: Why Christian Kids Rebel

Here is my review from GoodReads:
4 stars

I read Tim Kimmel's other book Grace Based Parenting a few years ago and loved it. I did start this book some time ago and stopped for some reason, but this time I read the whole thing.

I enjoyed it mostly and agree with many of his conclusions, but it didn't speak to me as deeply as Grace Based Parenting. Maybe this is because I haven't experienced rebellion from my children...yet! (Let's hope the 'yet' never comes!)

As I said, though, I do agree with his outlook on parenting children as a Christian in the main.

He categorises Christian parenting which may create rebellious children into five groups:

Compulsory Christianity
Cliché Christianity
Comfortable Christianity
Cocoon Christianity
Compromised Christianity

The dangers in modern Christianity for our children is that we have created cocoons for our children – evangelical ghettos. We listen to Christian music, watch Christian TV, mix with Christian friends, go to Christian events…I could go on. We treat our faith as a hobby, enjoying our church events and church meetings, but a hobby that doesn’t change us or anyone else. We drill our children with Bible study and catechism but we don’t demonstrate an authentic relationship with Christ lived out under stress in a world antagonistic towards the true gospel. We create children who can say “Hallelujah” when things go well, but don’t realise they are living a cliché where they don’t know the Yahweh Whom they are praising. We keep our children safe from the world, but they never know what a changed life is, what a sacrificial life is, what sin really means to a lost world. We keep our children ‘safe’, but when they meet real life their faith will not weather the storms.



~oOo~

At the end of the day I agree with much of what Tim Kimmel says, but having never fully tested his theory (my eldest child is nearly 11) I can't say that everything he says is correct! But I do believe that children need to develop real, authentic relationships with Jesus that can be lived out in a stressful and testing world. He has to be their rock and their fortress. I am afraid to wrap my children up too much in cotton wool that when they reach the age of responsibility they are unable to cope with or are enticed by the world. I am afraid that just because now as youngsters they say and do (mostly) the right things doesn't mean that I've got it made and can be complacent.

I can only...
Pray.

Trust.
Guide.
Love.
Offer grace.
Try to live a REAL life in Christ.
Love...again (because you can never love too much).

4 comments:

Melissa said...

I can only...
Pray.

Trust.
Guide.
Love.
Offer grace.
Try to live a REAL life in Christ.
Love...again (because you can never love too much).

I was telling Tim just yesterday how raising your child to be a Christian is a lesson in humility because no matter what I do, I can't give them true Faith, I can change their Heart. I have to Trust God to do that.

Sarah said...

It is a lesson in humility, we can feel like we have it all made because when they are younger they just love Jesus, it's when the tests and trials start, when they begin reasoning and questioning for themselves, when the temptations of the teenage years start...Jesus is bigger than all that though isn't he?

For me, I don't trust prayer enough...I KNOW that God is more powerful than anything and that I cannot control my children's faith, but it's hard not to try to control and protect too much.

Dulce Domum said...

Lovely pictures of your big girl in Devon.

My big girl will be in Year 10 whe she goes back in September, she'll be doing her GCSEs and her teachers are already discussing which A Levels she should do - she also has an (ahem) young gentleman caller. Time flies. She hasn't rebelled yet. The other day we were driving about on our travels and the little one was singing Hong Kong Garden by Souxie and the Banshees - then she segwayed straight into Great is my Faithfulness. I said, "oh, an Goth Anglican mash up!" The big girl said, "that's me, I'm a goth Anglican mash up!" We all laughed, but the big girl is right, she is a goth Anglican mash up. The excessive eyeliner hasn't dampened her love of God. For her it is as natural as breathing and I'm quite envious! I suppose what I'm trying to say is that as they grow up they will have to walk their own walk and we just have to trust in God and hold their hands when necessary.

Sarah said...

Lol Siouxsie and the Banshees was the first band I ever saw live! It was the Peepshow tour.

That's what we want for our children, for the them to have a genuine, real relationship with God. Honest and truthful. I don't want to programme my children I want them to have true faith.