Moving Forward and Staying the Same

"Around here, however, we don't look backwards for very long. We keep moving forward, opening up new doors and doing new things, because we're curious... and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths."
- Walt Disney

I'd been thinking about the direction of this blog and what to do with it and what I wanted out of blogging when Sandra (one of my most favourite bloggers) wrote this post: Do Yourself a Favor, which is a brilliant post, just pop over for a read.

She writes:

"So I'm making a conscious effort to maintain what my blog is about, to never change it, whether its look or the content of the posts, it doesn't matter. I want my readers who have been here from the very beginning in 2006 to feel like this is home, familiar, not like a completely different blog they stumbled upon."

This is why I love Sandra's blog.  She is not ashamed of who she is, she writes beautifully and her love of her family and home are just so evident in her writing and photographs.

But for me, blogging has been a bit up and down over the years.  Since I started blogging in 2005, I've had numerous blogs, off the top of my head they have been: Seeking His Glory, Faith, Hope and Love, A Bend in the Road, Another Bend in the Road, Verity Grace, Like Sunshine in the Home and this one now. I've been known as Mrs. Blythe (named after my favourite book character), Verity Grace and now my real name Sarah H. Sadly I've lost everything prior to September 2009 because of changing blogs so much, but I did import things from my last three blogs to this one.

Looking back I wondered why I changed blogs so much really.  I think it's because I wanted to 'find myself' - perhaps thinking that the blog is always greener on the other side haha :D.  Perhaps because I belonged to a crazy church that tried to mold me into what the leadership wanted me to be I was almost a split personality and couldn't settle on who I wanted to 'be' online because the church wanted me to be a perfect clone.

The funny thing is, every time I've changed my blog they've all morphed back into being very similar.  A mix of devotional, day-to-day family life, homemaking, and occasional angst about something...oh and funny pictures of cats and my obsession with words and etymology.

I set up this blog in reaction to leaving that crazy cultish church.  I think subconsciously I wanted to be like those spiritual abuse bloggers who help others in similar situations to escape the clutches of controlling and damaging churches.  Perhaps I saw myself with a huge group of adoring followers and a book deal. Hahahaha.  But of course this blog has done what all my other blogs have done, morphed back to type...and I have very few followers. LOL.

Symphony of Love, Flickr

I'm glad in a way.  Of course I will still share my experiences and rants about struggling with church stuff, but I'm glad it's not just about that.  I don't want to dwell in perpetual victimhood.  It's all about moving forward in my life and enjoying it!  I've lectured about spiritual abuse at our local bible college and people have been helped by it, so I can use my experiences to help others.  I don't want to name and shame, that's not what my blog's about, instead I want to document how I personally am moving forward.  And, of course, continue to share my day-to-day life and thoughts about this, that and the other.

I've learned that It's OK to Fail and it's OK just to be me.  Not perfect.  Not a clone.

I'm moving forward, but I'm still being me.

I started this post with a Walt Disney quote which is quoted in the film Meet the Robinsons.  Here's another from this film:

- You failed!
- And it was awesome!
- Exceptional!
- Outstanding!
- I've seen better.
- From failing, you learn.
- From success, not so much.

Four lessons I've learned:

• You do learn from your mistakes.  
• God does use messy people.  
• You only find out who you are by moving away from who you're not.  
• You can enjoy life while you're doing all this.

Let's hope that I stick with this blog from now on...but I can't guarantee it ;) hahaha

Big hugs and happy blogging!

Another bend in the road...

From Flickr

Well, I'm so excited!  It's a new beginning.  Another bend in the road, if you will.

As of today, I'm no longer an employee of anywhere except my family (LOL).  Our family has had a hard past year and we made the decision that it would be better for all if I could stop work and just concentrate on family things.  So, I'm now going to help Mum care for Grandma and just look after my family for now.  It was a scary decision, I had a great job at a school, but it needed to be done and I am so grateful that we are in a position that I am able to do this.

I would be grateful for your prayers for my husband, who has found out he has some health problems, for my Mum who has had some health issues, for my wider family too...and for me too, I'm so fatigued with all the stress and a busy job and family...etc.

Here's to family!

Hugs.

Jesus is holding me up

I have left the place where it is my fault that the sick aren't healed.

I have left the place of the pointing finger.

I have left the place where I am told that I continually let Jesus down, instead I have come to a place where I am told, "It is not you who is holding Jesus up"

~Jesus is holding me up~

Being all we were created to be

My longest bloggy friend Michele shared a quote on her lovely new blog Our Daily Work, in her post 'Becoming Yourself':

"The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself.” — Anna Quindlen

This is so important.

There can be so many voices in our lives telling us who we ought to be to make us 'perfect': the preacher/pastor at church, our family, articles written by fellow Christians, magazines, TV, etc. But what we really need to ask is - who was I created to be? If we try to be like someone else, or to be what someone else thinks we should be, we forget our Creator intended us to be ourselves! Even right down to the colours we love, songs we enjoy, our sense of humour, the skills we possess.

I was thinking this when reading a book about the different kinds of fish there are with my youngest (I know even fish can cause me to think deep philosophical thoughts - ;) LOL). The variety of fish is amazing, some are beautiful, some are plain, some are downright weird looking - but they're all amazing. If that is how God created the little (or big!) fish then how much more variety there must be amongst us humans! :)

Another thought - the Greek word translated 'perfect' (telios), like when Jesus told us to be perfect as our Father in heaven is perfect, actually means perfect as in 'complete' or 'fullness' - i.e. we should be all that we are meant to be just as God is all that He is meant to be. I love that.  I always imagined it meant perfect as in without fault, but really it means full and complete.  Being all we were created to be.

Who did God create you to be?  What do YOU enjoy doing?  What makes your heart sing?  When you were a child what activities did you enjoy the most?  What colours are your eyes drawn to?  What books do you read over and over? What scriptures particularly feed your soul?

This is all part of you.  Every human hears the call of heaven in their hearts, it is that which draws us to beauty and to love.  We were created in the image of God, we were created to show every aspect of our Creator.  In this messed up world it has become distorted, but Jesus has set us free to be made complete, to be the fullness of all God intended us to be, to be beautifully different every single one of us.